At the age of 72 I begin to think about something we often do not want to consider. How I will meet death and what, if anything, comes after. Life begins and then it ends. You start out with someone wiping your ass and you often end with someone doing the same for you.

In between what have we accomplished? Did we help or hinder others? Did we do good, not so good or evil? The real question will be: is mankind better off for our being here?

At the time I write this, my brother is lying in a hospital with lung problems. And I have such a feeling of dread right now. It just keeps popping up, I can’t seem to shake it. (update: he is home and doing better)

Having been raised a Catholic and with a nun – who also happens to be my godmother – and a priest in the family, of course we were taught there is a reward coming to us in the hereafter; my brother and I were even alter boys during our growing up years. But when I became an adult I admit to feeling a great deal of skepticism regarding the existence of a hereafter.

Religion itself is nothing more than a means to control those who would be controlled. Always has been and always will be. Over the ages, so many conflicts have been fought over, and so many innocents have died in the name of, religious ideals. I cannot believe any true god would condone this. Mankind is the only species with the power to exterminate and fails to realize the fact he can do this to himself as well.

Faith though is something different. I look up at the night sky and have faith that there is a power greater than I and faith that there is a good reason why things happen the way they do. If that faith is not there then why do I even exist?

We are made up of the same elements contained in the universe at large so in passing does our life force just leave us and return to the universe? And what does that mean to the universe? To us? What happens to our consciousness – who we really are? Where does that life force go?

And one also wonders if there is a ‘Supreme Being’ that we all tend to look for to give us the answers. Why is my brother in the hospital – he doesn’t deserve this – he is a better person than I ever was? Why aren’t my prayers for him being answered? Why aren’t our prayers for a better world not answered? Given all the adversity going on in today’s world one wonders just where is god, if indeed one does exist.

I’ve never subscribed to the idea that; ‘pain must be experienced before you can know pleasure’. Bull Crap!

In between our arrival and departure what have we accomplished? Did we help or hinder others? Did we do good, not so good or evil? The real question will always be: is mankind better off for our being here?

At some time you and I will have to answer these questions. How will you
do on this test? I wonder how our politicians will do?

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